Dead Giraffes
by suburbs
Summary: Chad and Zora are unlikely friends - but they are both devious enough to see the advantages. Tag to "Sonny in the Middle".


_Disclaimer: I do not own Sonny with a Chance._

_A/N: Normally I don't write SWAC, but I loved the Zora/Chad moment in Sonny in the Middle. Hopefully they are somewhat in character._

_**Dedication: For **__**faerietaleredux, because she'll laugh when she sees I wrote a Chad story.**_

Chad couldn't believe that the evil elf girl had dragged him to an animal morgue, which had to be one of the most disgusting things he had ever seen. And he had walked in on Marshall and Ms. Bitterman making out once, so that was really saying something.

This is what happened when you tried to do something nice – you ended up in a room with dead giraffes on ice.

What was worse, he had no one to blame but himself. He had panicked. The girl had made that sad face, and it was like his brain had stopped functioning. Apparently Portlyn wasn't the only one who shouldn't talk without a script.

In his defense, his publicist was still fuming over the puppy-pushing thing, so the last thing he had needed was for someone to come along and think that he had made some little girl unhappy. What if she had started to cry or something? Chad Dylan Cooper didn't do tears. Unless it was little girls crying tears of joy from being in the presence of Chad Dylan Cooper. He was cool with that – they just couldn't help themselves.

Plus, taking the weird kid to ice cream should have been a win for him; he'd get ice cream, and he could send an anonymous tip to a Hollywood gossip blog that Chad Dylan Cooper had taken a poor, sad child actor to ice cream to cheer her up after her cruel cast mate ditched her. He would have looked good at the expense of someone on that stupid comedy show. It should have been perfect. But he couldn't be in a blog about dead animals.

After dropping the mini-Random off at her dressing room (and patting himself on the back for not leaving her at the morgue), he decided to cheer himself up with a little frozen yogurt. While it wasn't ice cream, it would have to do. After filling his cup, he settled at a table, planning on pouting and feeling sorry for himself. He wasn't actually going to go so far as frown because that caused wrinkles, but he could stare moodily into space and project a general air of gloominess. That always worked for MacKenzie.

"Oh, my gosh!" He heard a voice behind him gush. Without turning he knew it had to be Sonny – no one else could gush like she could. "Thank you so much Chad! Zora just told me that you took her to see the dead giraffes. I got so caught up in all this mess with Nico and Grady that I totally forgot."

She pulled up the chair next to him and dropped dramatically into it before continuing, "That was so sweet of you. I actually didn't believe her at first until she showed me the photos."

Chad blinked. There were photos of him with dead animals? Crap!

Struggling to regain his composure, he managed to say, "I never do the expected, Monroe. You should know that by now."

"True," Sonny said with a smile. "Well, I have to get to rehearsals, so I'll leave you to your frozen yogurt." As she got up, she placed a hand on his shoulder. "Thanks again, Chad."

He watched her walk away and realized that he didn't feel like moping any more. And for some reason, his shoulder was sort of tingly where she had touched it and he felt a little warm. He hoped that wasn't a sign that he had contracted some rare giraffe fever. He couldn't remember what had actually killed the things – he had been too busy trying not to throw up.

Chad had been pleasantly surprised when the photos of him at the morgue hadn't ended up on the internet. He still suspected that the little ghoul might try to blackmail him later, but for now he seemed to be in the clear. Latter when his phone had rung and the caller ID had shown a strange number, he had hesitated for a moment before answering, but curiosity got the better of him. It could be a freaky-stalker fan or a famous movie producer, so it was worth the risk.

"CDC here," he answered cockily.

"Chad, you do know those are the initials of the Center for Disease Control, right?" a squeaky voice asked him.

"First off, they may have used the initials first, but I use them best," he said arrogantly. "Second, who is this?"

"Zora."

"Who?" Chad asked in confusion.

"Giraffe girl."

"Oh. Yeah. We actually call you evil elf girl over at the Falls."

"Really?" She squealed excitedly. "Thanks!"

He rolled his eyes. The girl was certifiable. "You're welcome," he replied. "How did you get my number?"

"Oh, I copied it from Sonny's phone. Did you know she has you on speed dial?"

Chad smirked at that little piece of information, "I didn't, but thank you for sharing. I can think of all sorts of uses for that."

"Don't get too cocky, Chad. I can always tell her that you have her as number three on your phone after your agent and your mom."

"How did you know that?" He stammered.

"Cause I picked your pocket while you were gagging near the road kill," she said as if it should have been obvious. "You need to toughen up, Cooper."

"I'm plenty tough…" he trailed off after realizing he didn't know her last name.

"I'd go with elf girl, if I were you," she offered helpfully.

"Thanks," he replied. He started over, making sure to put an edge to his voice, "I'm plenty tough, elf girl."

"Nice. That was almost menacing."

"MacKenzie Falls isn't the number one rated Tween show for nothing. I can act."

"Whatever," she said dismissively. "So I bet you're wondering why I'm calling."

"Not really."

She ignored him and continued, "I need you to take me to Monkey Cars 3-D tonight. It's PG-13, so I can't get in on my own."

"No way! Taking you to the morgue was my good deed for the year. Chad Dylan Cooper does not go to the movies with little kids."

"Please Chad," Zora whined. "Sonny was supposed to take me, but she ditched me to go to the movies with Nico and Grady. And you're the only one I can count on."

"Yeah, that isn't going to work a second time," Chad said coolly.

"Fair enough," she said. "I would have thought less of you if it had." She paused before adding, "And I don't actually think that much of you."

Chad had to admit the kid had style. No one else but Sonny would have insulted him and complimented him in the same sentence like that.

"What if I told you that I would talk you up to Sonny if you took me?" the tiny svengali offered.

Chad tried to remain calm. "Why would I care if you said nice things about me to Sonny?"

"Don't play dumb with me, Chad. We all know you like her."

"I don't like Sonny. I may possibly think she's cute and enjoy arguing with her, but I don't like her."

"So you don't care that she has been talking non-stop about how sweet it was of you to take me to the animal morgue?"

He couldn't help but grin at this news. Somehow it made him feel very happy that Sonny was pleased with him. He hesitated a moment before asking, "No dead animals in this?"

"I think all of the monkeys survive."

"Okay, I'll do it. But on two conditions. First, you say lots of nice things about me around Sonny."

"Of course," Zora answered.

"And second, I meet you at the theater. I'm not taking the chance of ending up at some butcher's shop or something."

"Deal," she said in response. "I should be able to get Tawni to drive me there. I'll text you the time and place."

Chad hung up the phone with a smile on his face. He couldn't wait to see Sonny's face the next time he saw her; she was going to love him! Plus, it was monkeys in 3-D and he had heard that it was like they were flinging stuff right at you.

Chad Dylan Cooper was back!


End file.
